rah rah sis boom bah

okay i did it.

it wasn't great but it's over.
there were lot of interruptions, starting right at the beginning, when
apparently, i shouldn't have used the word "referential" even though i
have used it a thousand times before and no one has ever ever ever said
anything. and even though i started using it because it was first used by
one of the people in the room. it was not exactly the right word, but
there is not a word for the idea i was trying to express. it is best
expressed as "highly referential".

but yeah i got tripped up by that and overall i'm not happy with my
performance. i didn't know there were going to be interruptions and that
sort of thing and i got flustered. i felt totally unprepared and there
were times when i was just staring wide-eyed and freaked out like a
squirrel. my voice was all croaky from the cold i have. it's so hot in my
apartment. i have a layer of film over my face, it's disgusting. i'm
totally chilling today after having a very difficult day yesterday.
because this cold, i can't shake it, because i haven't gotten any good
rest since i got it. so rest is what i'm doing but it's so hot here i
wanna jump in the lake.

sorry this is really rambling but i don't wanna go back and read it.

thanks mom for calling to see how it went, that made me feel great. :)

thanks liz for your comment, after i read it, i felt better. :)

i don't want to be famous. well, not for this anyway. i wanna be famous
for having the world's most-commentedest-ever blog. no i don't know.

dear older people who went through your twenties: is it supposed to be
this disorienting? am i supposed to feel like i'm wasting my life?

i dont' want anyone to freak out, i'm not like what the hell depressed or
anything, i'm just, well i worked my ass off for two years to get this
masters degree, i got done and i was like whatever. i'm gonna go home and
play guitar.

i did feel better after mike came home from work and we hung out and went
to the bar and i came home and talked at him for like three hours and then
i tripped over my bike and i ended up getting injured on basically every
major body part, including a bizarre scraped up toe and a rugburn on my
wrist.

no, i wasn't *that* drunk, don't worry, family, it was just like 5am and i
was really tired and i turned off the light and then walked without
waiting for my eyes to adjust.

i think i'm going to go get in the lake now, it's so hot in here.

thanks for your support everyone!

stevie wonder summer, 2005, starts now!!!!