rah rah sis boom bah

1. i was brad and angelina's babysitter. not a nanny but like the
babysitter they call when they want to go to the movies on a friday night.
they lived in a normal sized house and all of their children were well
behaved. i set a pizza on fire, but not on purpose. they paid me an
appropriate amount when they returned home.

2. we played a show and no sound came out of my guitar. this is the
equivalent of one of those dreams where you open your mouth to scream but
nothing comes out. you know, you just feel ineffective and lame?

3. another one that was funnier that i can't remember.

god she is so uncool. i need to stop reading her column.

why the chipmunks theme was stuck in my head. i just remembered at our last show someone in the audience told us that we  were just like the chipettes.  at first i was all like, the chipettes? dude, please.

but then i watched this video and i think he was right:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=9zPCSqeoFiA

we're the chipmunks
C H I P M U N K
we're the chipmunks
guaranteed to brighten your day

do. do. do do do do. do. do. do do do DO!

now it's in yours

AAAAHAHAHALHAHAHAHHAHSDKLFHK;LSAHFDKSL;AJF;KLDASJF;KLASDJF;KALJF;DSAJFKDSL;AJFS;DLAKJ

i should *not* drink coffee you guys.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=1EkmnlmtNLo

mike: it makes me wanna puke when i see it. i mean they took something
beautiful and made it disgusting.

me: what was that, boobies? or girls making out? which one?

long pause

mike: well, boobies, i guess. if i have to choose.

i'm not exactly sure *why* i'm awake at 6:30 watching an episode of "a
different world", but i am.

i'm even less sure of why these a-holes ended an episode at "to be
continued" right after dwayne wayne just told whitley he went out with
another woman. WHAT WAS HER REACTION HOW DID SHE REACT? This episode of
"martin" that you're playing right afterward is not answering those
questions for me at all. this is sooooo frustrating.

god i have to get up early tomorrow too to see the second half. thanks
carsey werner teleprises. thanks a lot. i'll be sending you my therapy
bills.

me: please email your papers to me.
student: how should we submit our papers to you? do you have a folder
hanging on your door? where is your office? oh god aaarrrgh

chillax children. chillax.