rah rah sis boom bah

some funny "mr t facts" i got from the internet:

Mr. T is allergic to doorknobs. That's why he can only kick through doors.

Despite popular belief, if there is a fool in the woods, and nobody is
around to hear his jibba jabba, Mr. T is still able to pity him.

Mr. T's hair style is actually a complex array of antennas that can
triangulate the exact location of any fool in the universe. His gold
chains can then transmit pity to those coordinates.

Mr. T made his van go twice the speed of light because he wanted to prove
that quantum physics was a bunch of jibba jabba.

Mr. T's GMC van does not travel on solid surfaces, but instead
mathematical planes. In other words, it can go wherever the hell Mr. T
wants.

Mr. T once got into a fight with a ninja. He killed the ninja, but only
after the ninja had cut off two of his fingers. Those fingers grew up to
be Gary Coleman and Webster.

Mr. T was once clocked at 100 fps. That's 100 fools pitied a second.

Mr. T was fired from the Psychic Friends Network for always predicting
pain.

If at the exact same moment, the same person was pitied by Mr. T and
roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris, the universe would implode.