Sunday, February 04, 2007

it's magical, isn't it?

one of the most wonderful things about sharing your home and your life
with the person you love is the excitement of learning all about their
bathroom preferences. mike and i differ on nearly every single one of
them, which means that every time i enter the bathroom, i have to change
everything to be, ya know, the way it's *supposed* to be. and he is,
apparently, doing the same thing.

the issue: light above mirror
me: on, you can see yourself
him: off, who knows why

the issue: amount of beard hair in sink
me: i don't have a beard, so naturally, none.
him: shave shave shave shave shave shave shave

the issue: that fan thingy that is broken and doesn't actually provide any
ventilation but rather just makes a really annoying whirring sound
me: off, it doesn't work and makes a really annoying sound
him: whir whir whir whir whir

the issue: shower curtain
me: closed, so you can't see our dirty bathtub
him: open, who knows why

the issue: toilet seat (of course!)
me: closed, so i don't fall in, jerk
him: open, because it makes peeing slightly more convenient for him

the issue: toilet paper roll
me: unempty
him: pull every last square off that sucker man

the issue: soap
me: right next to the edge of the sink so that if some spills, it goes in
the sink
him: back by the wall for some reason

it *is* magical, isn't it


Comments:
oh please. if there was a landfill for the tp you have gone through in a week there would be a sad old mexican man standing there with a shovel saying "no mas! no mas!"

and i always put the seat down! 99 percent of the time!

-m
 
hahahahahahahahhahahahahahah
 
its a little known fact but men cannot touch the actual cardboardlike substance tp rollls are made of. apparently this and palmolive are like kryptonite and will render them totally useless. there are still studies being done on what full trash bags are made of so most men are not even taking the risk of touching them. other items being studied include ajax,windex and laundry soap. more later....tm
 
hahaha mom

i can't talk though because mike probably does more cleaning around here than i do. so you can imagine how nasty our apartment can get...
 
i am a former janitor. i have touched things in a bathroom most people don't even have nightmares about.
 
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